My son, if you receive my words and treasure up my commandments with you, making your ear attentive to wisdom and inclining your heart to understanding; yes, if you call out for insight and raise your voice for understanding, if you seek it like silver and search for it as for hidden treasures, then you will understand the fear of the Lord and find the knowledge of God.
- King Solomon
Life is not about you
This is a truth I have to remind myself often, even if my instincts oppose it. By nature I'm wired to make me the center of everything—my own needs, desires, disappointments. This is the great temptation I’m faced with every morning.
In his poem, As The Ruins Fall, C.S. Lewis writes:
All this is flashy rhetoric about loving you.
I never had a selfless thought since I was born.
I am mercenary and self-seeking through and through:
I want God, you, all friends, merely to serve my turn.
He goes on to say how we cannot crawl outside of our skin and how we're self-imprisoned. Therein lies our problem: we are obsessed with ourselves and our own well-being.
Whether I’m basking in success or dealing with the hard blows of life, I want you to be caught in my vortex. I need you to play supporting actor to my lead. This is the disease of self.
This could be a depressing thought. But if you accept it, learn to break free from it, and see your purpose in serving others instead of yourself, then this may be one of the most fulfilling and relieving truths you've discovered yet.
"For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it."
Death is at your doorstep
We are all terminally ill.
You might literally have a cancer diagnosis and only six more months to live. Or you might have a "clean bill of health" and enough good fortune to live another sixty years. Either way it's not looking good, because you are going to die.
Another depressing truth, I know, but this could turn out for the good.
Should we choose to use this as a pivot to ask bigger questions, to inform us on how to live rightfully, to seek the purpose of life (and specifically, your purpose), then not all will be lost. In fact, it could be the start of something powerful.
Too many of us in this generation are too okay with just showing up. Waking up and allowing life to happen to us. It's a life being lived in the passive. Being distracted by screens and apps and wasting away in a Huxleyan state of numb.
Just remember, you’re dying. We’re all dying. And in a hundred years the chances are good you will be forgotten.
So, make the most of your day. Do your best to be present in every interaction and every moment. Take effort to examine your life. Consider your legacy, and think about more than just how to make your life the most safe and comfortable little bubble there is.
Because it may pop at any moment. And there is no guarantee of tomorrow.
Let the Sadness In
Grief and loneliness have become familiar friends. They were occasional strangers, perhaps in a time past, and I would always resist their entry.
Now, I find them knocking on my door often. Whether it is due to circumstances out of my control, or to the broken machinations of my own making, I find this state to be more of the new normal.
This could be a thorn in my side, should I let it be. Instead, I’ve learned how to channel it in a new light.
I've taken my pain and used it to deepen my prayers to an incarnate God who also suffered. I've used it to sharpen my inner thoughts and ability to connect with others. I've allowed it to teach me greater wisdom and compassion towards my fellow humans.
It’s not easy, and there is some pain that can feel at times overwhelming. It can overtake one like a wave. Yet, by the mercy of the God, learn to float and not drown.
Don't waste pain. It might be that there is a greater purpose in it, too.
Perseverance for the journey ahead
Sometimes, God wants to take us on a long and beautiful journey. But as it stands, He knows that we’re not ready.
Not for a lack of desire or passion, but maybe because our wings aren't strong enough. Maybe we're not ready to endure the difficulties ahead. We always dream of touching the sun—we never think of turbulence.
In these times, we must patiently wait.
When the time is right, we'll know it. And it is in that moment, when our wings are full, that we will ascend to the skies and touch the air breathed by angels. We will rise above the very heights we once thought were unreachable.
Until then, we must wait. And learn to be really good at walking.